Shroeder… Linus… PEANUTS!

Dear Awkward,So earlier this evening, Cameron, Marissa and I were enjoying dinner at Ingersoll before getting Marissa’s new Betta fish. Talking in preparation for the fish I asked Marissa if she had thought of any names for her new member of the family. She said she wasn’t sure so I said… “How about something from ‘Peanuts’ … like Shroeder. …just not something retarded like Linus.” Almost as if on cue, Cameron goes: “Uhm. That’s the name of my bird.” … there was a huge festive pall over the dinner table for a good eternity before the awkward resulted in lots of laughter. But “Linus”… REALLY? -Chris 

Yep. Chris really just said that.

Dear Awkward,History 150. Even just typing it makes me want to sleep due to excessive boredom. But Chris always seems to find a way to spice things up a bit and actually make the class tolerable. The other day, he was stressing about how much work he had to get done for the week….”Ugh Stef I have so much work to do and I have this huge project due on Thursday that is totally gonna suck my butt.” LMAO… I literally did not stop laughing for a good 6 minutes. Who says that?!! Leave it to Chris to formulate the most awkward expressions! Like….”Its totally like getting raped with something hard and sand-papery”. AAAHHHH. Thank you for the awkward visuals Chrissicus.  ~Stefanie

….whaaat?

Dear Awkward,     I was eating lunch at Braiden with Will yesterday. We were sitting in silence, just enjoying our meal, when all of the sudden he says “Hey, Stef. I don’t know if you knew this but…my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard.”  LOL. I seriously died. You would have too, especially if you know Will. It was just soo….awkward!! ~Stefanie

Adventures in Astronomy

So our Astronomy Professor spent literally half of our class today doing magic tricks in front of the class. And not only was he doing magic tricks, but he was doing magic tricks in an obnoxious tie dye shirt. With obnoxious matching tie dye socks below his obnoxious high-water slacks. Also, right before class ended, he was listing off expensive hobbies after noting a telescope that cost 15,000 dollars, and included “women” in this list. Not sure if he was referring to hookers, orrr just that women cost a lot to keep around. Hmm. Awkward. ~Stefanie

Pop Goes The Weasel

Dear Awkward,So, the CSU Theatre Department is currently doing a run of Harold Pinter’s comedy of menace play “The Birthday Party.” This show, with its many amazing lines and awkward moments in itself, has officially scarred part of my soul permanently. For those who may be unfamiliar with the show, there is a moment when the title of a familiar children’s song (“Pop Goes the Weasel”) is referenced in a rather uhm… romantic encounter between to characters. This has permanently ruined part of my childhood. Yep… my childhood is writhing over there *points* on the floor, in pain… twitching spastically.-Chris J.C 

Oh, sweet Linda

Dear Awkward,A couple of days ago my suitemates decided to put a picture of a naked man (with his back to the camera), in our shower. Ummm….yeah that is awkward in itself. But there is more. Linda, the sweet little old cleaning lady was cleaning our bathroom this morning when all of the sudden I heard “Woo! Nice buns on that guy!” (HUH??!!!). Then my suitemate says “Yeah! haha, you like that?” and she responds in a loud, raspy voice ”Ooo baby!”  *jaw drops*. AWKWARD.  -Stefanie 

Chris is Slowly Corrupting Stefanie

 Dear Awkward, Ahem. So. Earlier today while eating lunch at Braiden, Chris tricked me into making a dirty hand gesture by repeatedly asking me how to siphon the water out of his fish tank. Awkward. And, not to mention, extremely embarassing! He then proceeded to text message all of our close-knit friends with the following message: ”I totally just got Stefanie to do the awkward jackoff hand motion. It was epic.” Thanks Chris. How awkward. -Stefanie 

Umm..EEWW!!!

 Dear Awkward,So, last Monday my professor proceeded to refer to 16th century astronomer Tycho Brahe’s observatory as the “wet dream” of Astronomy. Awkward. -Stefanie 

ARE you serious?!

 Dear Awkward,

 So on Dec. 14, 2007 I got rear-ended by a guy in a Nissan Frontier pickup truck. He was texting while driving. AWKWARD. -Chris J.C